“He Flew Away, But Promised To Return”… But Will Not Return

Congratulations to Aleksey Navalny on the finale of a successful fraud! Operation “Emigration” was successful — all the ways back to the unloved Russia were correctly cut off.

2020 was bad for everyone — but there was at least one good gift for Russians: they took Navalny away from them. Navalny in this year was finally done for, worn out, dilapidated, covered with lawsuits, but the last skin was removed from him in the form of a “poisoning” and that was the end of the character’s suitability for anti-Russian use. And what next?

The used product itself, however, understood that there are two ways: the way that is beneficial for the “Beautiful Russia of the Future”, and the way that is more suitable for him personally. The first option consists in after staying in Germany, to return to Russia, in every possible way to run into trouble, and then to die at the hands of unknown killers — and finally to turn into a symbol of the fight against the regime, into a second Nemtsov. For obvious reasons, Navalny’s curators prepared him for precisely this track, keeping silent, however, about the finale, in connection with which he constantly said that he will definitely return, just after he would improve his health, just one more month, just one more week … But the cunning Aleksey himself was not so naive, and in his heart he knew what he was waiting for.

He was waiting for December 30th! And he waited!

Presenting the best New Year’s gift, the Russian Federal Penitentiary Service informed him: “In accordance with the court’s verdict, the conditionally convicted person has been assigned duties, for the failure of which he is liable under the legislation of the Russian Federation. In case of confirmation of the fact of evasion of the conditionally convicted person from the control of the Criminal Executive Inspectorate (hereinafter referred to as CEI), measures will be taken against him as stipulated in Part 4 of Article 190 of the Criminal Executive Code of the Russian Federation. On 12/28/2020 notification of attendance at the CEI has been sent to A.A. Navalny“.

Well, we remember, and Navalny himself remembered even more so, that he was on probation and had to regularly report to the police. If he evades such duties, then the prison sentence changes to a real one. By December 30th, Aleksey wasn’t going to get to Russia at all — and great! “Oh, how I successfully missed the test, I didn’t know anything anyway“.

And then the simple plan works like clockwork: Navalny “skipped the test”, he was “kicked out of school”, and that’s all – “hooray, holidays!”. There is no need to return to Russia, where he will now be immediately sent to prison! Farewell, unwashed Russia….

After all, the excuse is now reinforced with concrete: I can’t go back to where they will immediately jail me, they will meet me at the plane with handcuffs. No, I will bring more benefit to our common cause here, on free German soil! Be strong, abroad will help us! I’ll give you a parabellum!

No, of course, for the sake of decency, everything was framed as a terribly unexpected surprise: “Just fantastic. The Federal Penitentiary Service, knowing full well that Navalny is being treated in Germany, is trying to jump into the last train car (Aleksey’s probation period ends on December 30th!) And it demands to report to the inspection TOMORROW. Otherwise, it will demand to replace the suspended sentence with a real one,” wrote Kira Yarmysh. Well, yes, fantastic! After all, it is so strange for a person who is under probation not to remember when he needs to be in the police station. Aleksey just forgot!

Things came out very ugly with “he is under treatment in Germany” also. In a statement, the Federal Penitentiary Service quoted an article from the “Lancet” magazine describing Navalny’s case and mentioning that on October 12th, he had gone through all the symptoms of ill health — and, therefore, there was no good reason for him to skip a visit to the police. As is said, “and there is a certificate” that the sick leave ended long ago, two and a half months ago.

Navalny himself began to make chaotic zigzags of logic and write a bunch of excuses at once: and in Lancet my last name was not given, and if you read the Lancet article with the title “Novichok Poisoning”, then why don’t you initiate a criminal case about my poisoning, and so on. All of this sounds very pathetic even upon a cursory examination.

First, Navalny’s case is described in extreme detail and recognizably: “On Aug 20, 2020, a 44-year-old man who was previously healthy suddenly became confused and began to sweat heavily on a domestic flight in Russia approximately 10 minutes after departure; he vomited, collapsed, and lost consciousness. After an emergency landing, the man was admitted to the toxicology unit of a local hospital in Omsk, Russia, approximately 2 h after symptom onset”. There is a date, Omsk, age of the patient, description of symptoms, and so on. There can be no such coincidences, and there is no need to behave affectedly as if “this is not me“!

Secondly, who the hell is going to open a criminal case about poisoning? The Federal Penitentiary Service will initiate one? Seriously? And this was written by a lawyer! The Federal Penitentiary Service does its job: it takes care that the registered citizen fulfils his duties before the law, and nothing more. He would have demanded from the doctors who treated him to open a criminal case!

That’s it, Aleksey, relax! You have now officially passed into the category of numerous “exiles”, joined the Khodorkovskys, Babchenkos and Chichvarkins. “There” you are more and more, and “here” – less and less. This suits both us and you.

Grigory Ignatov

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